feeling so much.

hm. i have so many thoughts in my head.

mel gibson is really the perfect man for the movie 'wad women wants'. honestly! i love that scene where he does all the sinatra stuff. swoons. why arent there any of these men around anymore?

and.. cancer cell symposium reminded me of how much more i need to learn before i can be a professional. the scientists giving the talks were really pretty amazing, the way they knew their stuff and all. i felt as if i was taking up space there.. they should have let my space to someone who knew their stuff more than i did. All i could do there was try nt to fall asleep and appreciate what they had done for cancer research for the past decades. and wads amazing was we met the guy who discovered the p53 tumor suppressing gene. he's still alive! and alot of wad we learn about cancer really happened during the past few decades and there are so much new research thats unpublished, so.. i felt pretty honoured to be in near vicinity of such amazing people. although i really did not understand a single word.

i wonder how was the econs test today..
i still have chem spa this wed.. thurs? wed.

im thinking.. i shd try to stay neutral more often. but sometimes u just cant help but get urself involved in making rash decisions which doesnt even go thru ur head for a split second. sometimes ur thinkin u shd just go for it. sometimes u think the decision's nt in you. sometimes u think the whole world is so inflexible and you get this suffocating feeling about how everything is being run. sometimes u get so fed up you just wan to scream into that person's head. sometimes u get so confused u just wan to ask that person outright whats exactly are you thinking of.
and sometimes u just dont wan to think about it anymore.

if i cld tell the world just one thg, it wld be. we're all okay. and nt to worry coz worry is wasteful n useless in times like this. i wont be made useless. i wont idle in despair. i will gather myself around my faith, coz light does darkness most fear. my hands are small i know but they're nt yours they are my own. and i am never broken.