FW: blogging onthego

-original message-
Subject: blogging onthego
From: teojiayun@gmail.com
Date: 27-04-2009 11:55

such n addictive thing to do-snap and blog, all from your phone! Im not showing off, just trying to show you guys the (pathetic) place im studying at. Couldnt/didnt want to get up today, and even though judy was here really early to do her rounds... Anw long story short our room got stolen today, and we're relegated to studying outside. Theres some drilling going on outside, and the platform we're on shakes whenever someone walks on it or smthg.

And all i really want now is some good old chinatown in my empty stomach:(

sigh should have woken up early today.

In other news, i had a great time at singapore day; eating and meeting (new) people. it really makes me think, that singapore is only so young, and how much further we can go as a country. Are we participating as citizens without knowledge of the law. Can we really teach law as a subject in schools? Surprisingly im rather cynical of how far more we can progress ('why are you looking at singapore through a white man's lens!') and maybe i should reevaluate my views. Ive always thought of myself as someone whos open and somewhat a rebel towards organised ideas, but maybe im not as liberal as i think i am. well, i wait in anticipation for my re-integration back into the singapore system come sept:)
then it was dear kevin's birthday celebrations, and man i havent laughed so hard in such a long time. I might have a little drunk from downing that small glass of wine though... But im glad i went:)

but for now, its schoool and more books. oh why isnt chinatown nearer!

Testing

location: new academic building 2nd floor toilet, second from the right.
"going to war to prevent war is the most stupid thing i've ever heard"

fire burns, you cool me down.

our study room got stolen today. ive been alternating between super-sleepy-by-10pm or insomnia-until-4am; but no fear, because my body clock demands that i wake up at 530am everyday. im not sure what im doing to my body, but i do know that my morning runs havent been materialising, and that i am, officially just putting energy into my body and not burning anything. school is too near to walk anything off!

and no i havent stopped watching the marvel/dc videos. i really do find it funny why doesnt anyone else think so!

but i just saw this on tv and i felt so happy watching it so i thought id share:) top gear football!

iloveyoutube.

im never one to youtube and watch videos the whole day. until i discovered these:

I'm a DC... I'm a Marvel

and the whole series of it. hee.

The Dark Knight Trailer in Lego

so throw me a rope to hold me in place

its so strange how i was so tired the nights before that ive been sleeping by 10pm , and then today i get a serious bout of insomnia.

im immensely enjoying listening to my new cds (i thought i bought jem's new cd, turns out i didnt), and ray lamontagne is constantly on repeat. that or the love actually soundtrack. i love love ray, he sounds like he's actually lived life and is telling it through music. he looks like it too, but i doubt thats in any relation to having lived life.

i tried to do some light reading to get drowsy (cue: medical law) but it was so boring i put it down after one article.

this afternoon i had old vjchoir songs on my itunes as i studied. cloudburst still gives me goosebumps; and i strangely enjoyed listening to the hebrew songs we did for sov. i didnt use to like it particulary, i guess when you're younger singing big bombastic songs were the only thing that mattered (or so i thought). but now listening back to the recordings, i thought our sound really suited the hebrew pieces.
i cant wait to sing again.
reminds me of how the same song can sound different and mean different things in different times. just like joni mitchell's both sides now, which i think is probably one of the best songs ever, just because when you hear the older version of it you can always feel her weariness of the world.

im not too sure this post has a point. ;)

or i guess, the point is that- IM STUDYING HARD.

trouble been dogging my soul since the day i was born

i zonked out at 1030 last night and woke up at 530 this morning. its been raining since yesterday here in london, so pretty gloomy day to be studying so hard.

but this morning i opened my email and i saw a link to a website from dear nab;) i glad for that timely reminder (not that im studying so hard i havent been having fun, last night we did carbonara and watched ami) to, well, take a step back and have a good look at the bigger picture, at life.
end of life issues have always been hard for me (cue: medical law; greys). but as i watched the videos i felt as if i was infringing on their privacy. their love for each other seemed like such a private matter, something too private to be shared perhaps? just like how i felt when i was reading a book on love letters by erm i cant rem who now.
beautiful nonetheless, and somehow addictive. it almost feels like you're doing something you shouldnt be doing. and then your brain conjures up imageries of these strangers, as if you already know what they're like and the lives they've had. the most hearwrenching bits are the juxtaposed pictures of them in their healthy happy, almost carefree selves and then the next one of them not so.
http://www.lifebeforedeath.sg/honouring.html
i guess, at the end of it all, thats the whole point - to love and be loved. and im glad my dear nab has found someone to share her life with ;) now im wishing the same for all my dearest peoples as well. in any case, ecp and me will always be there!

gah.

school is still closed, and only reopens on thurs. which means im stuck in the library, ah the bane of my existence. horror of horrrors, people were actually crowding around waiting for it to open! sadly i was one of them.

then i was lamenting about how i hate the library, and my friend said 'you're just not as dedicated..'

am i studying or what

so, the whole of london was closed from thurs-monday, or well, at least school was closed so that to me means london was closed cos im stuck at home trying to study but then theres top gear all the time on tv (i even caught the repeat of repeat episodes) so really, hardworking i am not.

anw, ive been meaning to say this for the longest time. my neighbour looks like mark sloan. if you dont know who mark sloan is, then, well. seriously.
he's a father of two kids and his wife is actually quite hot. ive only just worked out that they own the hair salon downstairs (i think.) you see, london is so small that i can actually see into their house (im directly opposite their kitchen and the kid's bedroom) as im sure they can see into my room and see that im not doing work at all and spend all my time on my bed. but hey, i get to see a carbon copy of mark sloan. besides their kid is really cute and he used to play with his train set which was right next to the window. now they've replaced it with some new toy i dont know what.

im quite sure he isnt actually eric dane cos he's here all the time, and his british accent is quite strong. although he smiled at me once when we met each other out on the streets, that was quite nice.

oh, bother.

my parents went to ubin this morning. they've officially outdone me- i havent even been there myself!!

this is what happens when you have a father who doesnt look like he's aged at all, and a mum who's fitter (in the british sense) than you.

mental note to self: will outdo my kids too. (hello mummy is going st james tonight dont wait up!)

in the wee small hours of the morning

mayling was so sweet- she brought me to a jazz and big band concert as my birthday present! :) stacey kent was really quite good; the BBC Big Band was rather entertaining, and then of course we spent half the time laughing at the drummer (who looks like a grown-up human version of Dexter) and a trombonist (who looks like Chandler when he was skinny and had a moustache). Dexter, i swear, looks like hes about to seize everytime the song ends with a big finish. it was absolutely thrilling to watch.

stacey kent looks so pixie, and her voice flows so effortlessly. we both liked her last song- in the wee small hours of the morning.

we were the youngest audience by a far age gap; the next youngest audience seemed to be around 40 years old. so may and i decided that we shall have to watch more of these concerts before music like these die out (literally, musicians get old too!) by the time we get old. seriously man, 'old music' for our generation will probably be britney spears doing her 50 years anniversary concert or something.

but, i just like to dream

i cant stop listening to jem's flying high, theres something very beautiful about the song. sadly beautiful. also because i was tired and tried to sleep, but i cant seem to fall asleep.

i wonder if people still believe in The One, or as you age you simply find someone to be with. what are people thinking when they pick people up: love at first sight, maybe luck, or do they not trust this grand notion we call love, so much so they take it into their own hands. for ive always thought you'd know if someone is The One.
but i doubt that anyone who doesnt do anything is any different from them.

perhaps the feeling of feeling alive, being in the moment; dreaming up a thousand different possibilities of what might bes, what could bes, and what will bes- thats what love does to you.
but that isnt love.

then sometimes i think that, that part of me is done. ive loved, and therefore i am done.

how i wish i could write beautiful songs too;)

though her home is on the surface she is still a universe

there! i made lunch in a box! how cool :)
but no, fried bee hoon tastes quite bad when its cold. i have to think of something better to put in it. and yes, a pretty lunch box is a motivation to actually use it. and yes, sadly, fried bee hoon is what ive been eating the whole week, although i think im properly sick of it already.

the end of my first study week.

if you know what i mean

ive been studying in school of late (okay fine, two days in a row, and today i didnt stay for very long) and when i get home im so drained that all i want to do is have dinner and then curl up in bed. which, is what ive been doing (its only 9pm and im already in pyjamas and tucked in bed, pretending to get some work done) and i think lulu has been a bit alarmed whenever he comes into my room and see me all tucked in bed. today i think he just shook his head.

anw i realised that at the end of a long tiring day, all i want is just some really, good, porn. yes, somethiing to perk you up, to cheer you up, alongside with a dish of sweet suckling strawberries.

and i have just the right thing for all you girls out there. (bet rai's excited now). guys can try it too but im sure you all already know it.




TOP GEARRRR.
yes, that alpha-male, fast speed, pulse-racing, adrenaline pumping show. forget the cars, watch the way they talk about the cars instead, and oh just indulge in their very sexy british wit. i get very excited when they rattle off the specs on a car; i long to sit and experience the sensation of being in the car they're raving (or not, which is often) about; they make me laugh, which is, very sexy. im in no way suggesting that any of them is, well, desirable (i think jeremy clarkson is balding..), but im saying the show, is ah!, well. you know what i mean.

now isnt that what porn is all about!

lets get rich and give everyone nice sweaters and teach them how to dance

and so it is that ive started studying for exams- although i would very much like to say 'studying hard for exams' but sadly that has not been the case. judy will be very ashamed of me when she finds out that ive woken up so late today; we were supposed to meet for lunch to motivate each other to be in school to study, but well well, its 11 already so i figured oh wells id be in sch after lunch then.

ive fallen in love with ingrid's music all over again, thanks to eug ;) and i think, i do want not to worry; have love to pay for bills; do what bunnies do; get rich and buy my parents a house in the southern france; build a house on a mountain and make everybody look like ants.
what wisdom!

i wish you bluebirds in the spring

with the song 'i wish you love' (rachael yamagata's cover) in our heads (at least in mine and cheryl's), we set off for greece, unpsyched, unprepared, and without any expectations. true enough, we bummed around in athens, and in my bouts of nauseau on the first day from all the travelling i gave my most "du lan" face; then there was the 8 hours ferry ride to Santorini at 7am in the morning the next day. the trip, was, in short, tiring.

i wouldnt do it all over again, but I will definitely visit Santorini again. the town, Oia (pronounced Eeeyaaaa), was weepingly beautiful, with the trademark whitewashed houses set along the cliffs, and the sunset just right next to it- the world's most beautiful sunset indeed. one day i would love to go back and get lost in the town, walk through all the dog-faeces path into little knacks and pockets of little doors that seemed to lead to no houses; or just sit, and admire the view.

of course the second highlight of the trip was Captain Slow (shawnie's very proud of me that i made a Top Gear joke), or Bimb (without the 'o', cos spelling doesnt go with the character), depending on my mood, which shall henceforth be my new petname for my lover (and yes, im still calling you my lover despite elderly objections). we had a good time teasing her and giving her a long string of names (Captain slow- nerd- Bimb- Awesome!-ambitious but not overly driven- of Upper Bukit Timah) but really, i nearly had a heart attack seeing her crash her ATV. the rest was funny (the tyre burn smoke from Cher that irritated my eyes, she held the brakes the whole time!; me trying not to crash into her whenever she brakes; the return journey that didnt require the use of the accelerator at all hahaha), just the crashing part, not.
but ah what memories if not for this ditz.

meet: My Newest Husband

among many others (georgie, hugh..) , i know, but hey, i cant help that they're sexy.

so it was last night where i added Joshua Radin to the list of sexy men that i want to, well, (wed is a rather strong word.. so how about) have as an imaginary husband. his speaking voice is incredibly sexy, and he has that twinkle in his eyes (or imagined twinkle cos i was not very near); and he is funny.

so heres for eug;)

oh lover, i'm lost

this week's greys featured the song 'duet' by rachael yamagata and ray lamontagne- its currently a favourite of mine and i was absolutely thrilled to hear it on greys. its about time derek stops being the rock of everybody; seeing him crumble makes him seem more human. just when i thought greys was getting stale;)

so jiax came and left; my essays written and handed in; paris trip gone and over.

hanging out with jiax and may made me feel like i was back in jc all over again; seeing each other 24/7 (twas the life of a chorister); making each other laugh over the silliest of things; and spending too much time in useless shops picking up anything and everything. 1130-1900 from my place and we got as far as oxford circus.

i fell in love, for the fourth time, with les miserables again. not having the luxury of west end down my street will be the biggest thing i miss from london.

the finality of my undergraduate studies is actually here! yay?

as the end draws near,

and so it was that i attended my last law ball, and my last vine night. it didnt really occurred to me until i was walking back home last night, barefooted, with my new swinging heels in my hands that i realised- hell these are my lasts.

and so i decided to become a little more active on facebook, cos, its really the only way to keep track of the people you've met and want to keep in contact with (or stalk) in the future.


law ball was such a last minute affair - getting the tickets, the shopping, down to the very last minute of preparing for the ball, which involved mainly the Crisis of the Shoe That Wouldnt Fit. in the end, with the lovely help of my lover, and two and a half insoles, the shoe fits!
cinderella my foot.
it was quite fun meeting (new) people, talking to my tutors, and seeing jerald run away from a girl. as judy said, it was rather like a girls night out, and for that im thankful ;)

at vine night i discovered a younger self of gurmit singh, who was so lovable even the boys were falling for him. of course, dancing in heels was not a very smart idea, and for the neutron dance (up down kick down) my shoe flew off. nope, not very glam. but ah, i hope vine survives our generation!

you got me begging you for mercy oh why wont you release me

so, i woke up early today to actually go for a class that i missed yesterday. the grand plan was to hand up my essay today (since there was no way i could have finished it yesterday) - and well, lets just leave it at that. anyway, it seems that good things come to people who wake up early (karma! or the bird thing), cos there was a really cute irish guy in the class;)
ah.

then i spent my lunch break between trying to get waiter's attention at cafe rouge, and shopping at covent for a dress for the law ball. i bought my dress in the last five minutes of our shopping, hows that for decisiveness ;)

now with all that settled i can finally get back to thinking about my essay(s). and debate. and coursework.
the work never stops!!

love, actually is all around

ive put off watching love actually for a really long time now, for reasons many- i had watched it too many times; kiat was synonymous with the signboards; and that i actually lost faith in the notion of love, really.

but phlegm in your throat does funny things to you, as with the spinning head and that clogged nose that threatens to upset your entire body system. rosh and i had tried to watch it last weekend, but then youku.com was acting up on us, so when i discovered that i still had it on my hard disk, i thought what better way to end my week than to watch love actually with a tin of ben's cookies, on my bed.

im glad for my shitty memory, because watching it again this time round (which must have been like my fifth time) felt like i was watching it for, almost, the first time. i knew the scenes, i knew the stories and the characters, but i still felt pleasantly surprised by the order of the scenes and little dialogues that i hadnt remembered; also the subtleties-the stories seemed richer, i could imagine a thousand different ways of what could be different; and i could identify with the places and the lovely ways of the english. and i got reminded of how much i loved this little boy and his gorgeous big eyes, and the moment he says 'whats worse than the agony of being in love?'

so perhaps i have let myself down for a long time now, and it does seem like a long time since to be picking up the pieces and collecting myself up, bit by bit. well bit by bit is just fine. ah, the wise tales of a third year student;) studying is good for your soul!